The tiawanese girl is M.I.A.

Atta' boy, Jeff.

Greenham Road

Krysta and I have been having many adventures as of late. The first adventure was to UNI.

It started with a phone call from sweater vest Justin when we had just barely reached Ames. Finally making it to Cedar Falls we find a wasted Justin and four of his closest friends waiting for us. He is dressed in a three piece suit waiting in the middle of a parking lot. After acting like a big dick, they show us to Wal-Mart. After acting like a bigger dick and peeing on the side of his friend’s car the sober girls realize that the drunken boys are being intolerable and take them away from us. Thank you, sober girls.

Kelly, Krysta, and I decide that a trip to Steak n’ Shake will make it all better. We get directions from some nice people at a gas station and I get scared by a dog…with EYES. After arriving at the Steak n’ Shake we are convinced that all of the employees have died, as there is no one to be found in the entire restaurant. Eventually someone comes to our rescue. That someone is the cook/waitress/cashier. She is an angry black woman who would fit in perfectly at The Wiener Circle. She holds the tablet to take our order on her breast. Kelly’s boobies are heckled by some boys.

On the way back to Campbell we think we’ve passed the exit for Hudson Rd, but we didn’t. We made a complete stop on the interstate to take an exit to Hudson the one horse town. We realize this is NOT right, and that it was so good there was no one on the interstate for that little fiasco. We get back to Kelly’s dorm, and attempt to locate a phone jack. We fail, go to bed, and I end up sleeping on the linoleum floor because it is so ridiculously hot in the room.

In the morning we look EVERYWHERE for breakfast. The consensus is that there just must not be many people who enjoy breakfast in Cedar Falls because it's just so hard to find. After a half an hour of this breakfast scavenger hunt, we hit the motherload with Panera off of University. Freeking amazing asiago bagel with garden veggie cream cheese. Heavenly.

There are now new pictures up thanks to our excellent tour of UNI while waiting for Ryan to arrive at his dorm. Look for them on my yahoo photo account.

After helping Ryan move in and requiring him to give his mother a hug, we skeeedaddle back to Ankeny to shower. We nearly ran out of gas, so it's high time for me to thank my father for the Caseys that is out in the middle of nowhere. It very possibly saved our lives.

-Ashley

Maybe they knew more than we knew
Because they danced and drank
While we jumped off the deep end

Stephen Sodheim

Somebody, hold me too close,
Somebody, hurt me too deep,
Somebody, sit in my chair
And ruin my sleep
And make me aware
Of being alive

Somebody, need me too much,
Somebody, know me too well,
Somebody, pull me up short
And put me through hell
And give me support
For being alive,
Make me alive.

Make me confused,
Mock me with praise,
Let me be used,
Vary my days.
But alone is alone, not alive.

Somebody, crowd me with love,
Somebody, force me to care,
Somebody, make me come through,
I'll always be there,
As frightened as you,
To help us survive
Being alive.

A West Side Story

Band Camp 2005 was semi-eventful. If nothing else, it was very wet. Sometimes it was very hot. I got matching marching blisters on my feet. I also ended up with nearly ten bruises all over my ankles and lower legs from kicking myself while running sideways and backwards at fast tempos.

My bass line consists of Steven, Karri, Dennis, Taylor, and me.

Steven is so very Steven. Occasionally he will run in circles chanting something, or he may take the time to introduce me to the world of cheap Happy Meals. He appears to be my closest form of entertainment whilst marching, because he stands next to me. He has the pleasure of carrying the top drum.

I’m just chillin’. A lot of my time is spent yelling at the tenors and basses to make lines, diagonals, or various other formations. Sometimes I shun responsibility all together. Either way, I play number two.

Karri might have no idea what is going on. I’m actually pretty sure that she doesn’t. There’s not much we can do with her but hope and pray that she will eventually figure it out. In other news, if she ever lets someone convince her that the trees on the horizon of Minnesota are Canada’s border I think I might flip. Dennis and I have decided to give her our old papers in hopes that she will read them and therefore no longer believe the current Pope is from Italy. She attempts to carry number three, and occasionally falls down because she’s marching backwards on her heels instead of her toes.

Dennis showed up to camp one day in bright pink short shorts. They could not compare to the day he showed up in a skort. He still yells just as much as he used to, but I still heart him. He carries number four.

Taylor is the new sophomore, and he’s pretty hardcore tall. It is my goal this year to break him of his fetish for words that demean entire groups of people. He also has the privilege of carrying our bottom drum.

Overall, I think camp went well. Despite all the rain, and ridiculousness, we are further along with the show than we were at this time last year. I love the music, and think the way the field show is written will really enhance the impact of it…when we do it right. D.Haack, J.Pop, & CO. did a great job.

-Ashley

You must remember this,
a kiss is still a kiss
A sigh is just a sigh
The fundamental things apply
As time goes by

The Ankeny Band Fundraising Extravaganza

Some things that might go wrong while you are participating in the Ankeny Band Fundraising Extravaganza…

1. A man may answer the door clad in only his underwear and outrageously hairy chest. If I’m going to be forced to fund raise, have some dignity, put some pants on.

2. It could be raining…a lot.

3. You may be propositioned. Read: “Hey guys, there’s a hot wet chick at the door.”

4. Sometimes, if it’s raining out, people will be depressed and refuse to buy cards because they are so angry.

5. You might get disoriented and go to the same house twice…or three times.

6. A man’s dog might tackle you. It becomes a good thing when both the man and the dog are cute.

7. An angry middle aged man who runs the fund raiser might become crazy and start counting money and taking it and asking you three hundred times whose money it is. Every time you tell him you don’t know, he tells you that you’re an irresponsible person. You eventually laugh at him, and he gives you dirty looks.

8. This same middle aged man might tell you that your section is five hundred dollars short, and that you owe him the missing money. You might suggest that you should simply liquidate your college fund and give it all to him.

9. You might have to stay and count money for an hour wishing to be back in the rain with the underwear man and the horny boys.

And finally, here is a shout out to John McKay. Even those of us who knew him by reputation and an occasional word here and there see that the debate community and the world have lost an amazing person. Rest easy, John.

-Ashley

I thought I'd write, I thought I'd let you know
In the year since you've been gone I've finally let you go
I hope you find some time to drop a note
But if you won't
Then you won't
And I will consider you gone

Attack of the sack!

Today Krysta and I set out on a fabulous shopping extravaganza for Katie McTavish's birthday. We got her some math story problems to solve and a picture frame. We also made her a card that said, "I'm so glad I'm friends with you and not some crazy scientist jerk named Sandra." It was completed with a picture of a erlenmeyer flask.

I was also forced into my very first scrapbooking store. I didn't really like it. It actually kind of creeped me out. All of the women were wearing Crocs and overalls. But I guess, like Krysta said, "They're happy." I made a simple request for someone to hit me with a car if I ever were to get domestic enough to work or shop there.

Joe Ross came with us for part of the adventure. He was so very out of control. He also brought us Joe Ross Mom cookies, and they were amazing.

Tomorrow begins the first day of my last week of band camp ever. I think it's going to be quite warm outside. Not going to lie, I'm not too excited about this. At least this years show only has ninety pictures instead of the 120 of last year.

-Ashley

Counting flowers on the wall
That don't bother me at all
Playing solitare till' dawn
With a deck of fifty one
Smoking cigarettes and watching Captain Kangaroo
Now don't tell me I've nothing to do